Will power is defined as :“The strength of will to carry out one’s decisions, wishes, or plans.”
or
“Control of one’s impulses and actions; determination; self-control.”
or
“The ability to delay gratification, resisting short-term temptations in order to meet long-term goals.”
Irrespective of which definition resonates with you, will power is something that very few claim to have and most aspire for. This power can lead you to persevere and achieve anything, be it quitting smoking, losing weight or any other seemingly impossible goal. It is equally easy to discount your failures to lack of will power. But I believe each and everyone of us has will power inherent in us. What we may not have is a clear understanding of what will power means and how to use it to get what we want.
Let us start by understanding what will power is. I have seen people being able to totally resist a cigarette one moment and be okay; and then fall victim the next hour or day. So does this mean you have this power only some of the time and it just disappears or weakens at other times? I have seen people be able to resist sugar for months but not be able to give up eating rice. So is will power only applicable to certain aspects? And most importantly when you do give in to temptation did you stop willing to achieve your goal? The answer is that will power is always present and can be applied to any aspect you want. What does vary however are 2 factor that influence the impact of will power.
Priority of your purpose: How important is your goal for you? Not why you want to achieve the goal; but on a comparative priority with all else, where does this goal stand for you personally? If I ask you, why is giving up smoking important to you what would you say? It is bad for my health? My spouse wants me to? But deep down do you really care? On a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being the highest priority, is it a 10 for you? If it wasn’t bad for your heath or your spouse wasn’t harping about it would YOU still want it? What would change if you didn’t achieve this goal and do you REALLY care about that? Similarly, why is losing weight important to you? Is it because you think you will look cool once you lose weight and people will like you more? If you could achieve popularity or fit into any dress without losing weight would your diet and fitness be a priority? The only way to meet a goal is to make it a 10 priority? And that is the big difference between why you do or do not achieve a goal. This will possibly explain to you why a person who has struggled to quit smoking, gives up in a single day after watching a loved one die of a smoking related disease. The priority of quitting shifts as the consequence becomes more real for them. Often people give up smoking after they have a child. Because protecting the child from smoking is a bigger priority for them than their own health.
The question that now arrises is how to take your goal’s priority to a 10. Can you? The answer is definitely yes although it may need some level of deeper analysis into your subconscious.
State management: This is an interesting and easier one to manage. How easily can you maintain a state that makes you say no to whatever habit you want to let go of? You will often notice that when you are able to say no you will be calm, collected and in control. If you are hassled or under stress chances are that saying no to that cigarette becomes that much more difficult. So the trick is to try to maintain the mental state where saying no is easier. Think back on when you were able to say no and remember what that felt like? And every time you are tempted, count to 10 or deep breathe for about 60 secs and try to regain that state. Chances are you will be able to say no.