Understanding purpose and why it’s not what you think.

A lot of clients come to me to figure out their true purpose in life. Many of these individuals are bored and frustrated with the work they are currently doing. And they want to know if there is more to life than the monotony of the daily grind. There is also a category of people who meet me almost in a panic because they don’t have a grand purpose in life. Everyone around them seems to have it all figured out but they are still unclear on their intent. The premise seems to be ” I don’t know what I want in life but since everyone else seems to know what they want something must be drastically wrong with me. Hence I need a coach to “fix” me.” I believe that clarity of purpose is important but I sometimes find that the question people want an answer to is not “What is my purpose in life?” but “What is my purpose that will lead me to glory, fame, fortune and stardom?” What is purpose? The dictionary defines Purpose as “the reason for which something is done or created or for which something exists” This implies two things. Firstly, purpose gives……

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3 steps to start breaking free when you are feeling stuck in a rut

We all go through phases in life when we feel stuck. Getting stuck  generally happens when: You are emotionally part of the situation and are not able to look at it objectively. There are negative emotions attached like anger, frustration, boredom. You feel you have no power/control on what’s happening. It could be in your career or business or in your personal life but the feeling is pretty much the same. Of being caught in a situation where you feel you have limited control in breaking out. Below are some powerful ways to break out if you are feeling stuck   1.Take back your power and the responsibility: When we start feeling stuck it is easy to fall into a victim mindset or accept the feeling of no control. It then becomes a vicious cycle of getting further pulled into the situation and feeling an even lower level of control. The first step is to connect back to the most powerful version of yourself. Ask yourself, “When I am feeling powerful, who am I?” We all have moments of strength and weakness. Taking on a more powerful mindset puts you in a more resourceful state where you find it easier to find solutions. Understand that the situation is not you. Like everything……

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What is the little voice in your head and what does it want?

Imagine this; you are outside an interview room waiting to be called in. The interview is for a job you really desire. You know you possess the right skills and experience. You are well prepared and dressed right. In spite of all that you are feeling a wee bit nervous. A close friend is accompanying you. As you look through the glass door of the interview room, your friend spots the interviewer and says, “That guy looks mean. He probably won’t like you. He may give you a hard time” Hearing this, your nervousness jumps up a notch. As you step into the interview room and come face to face with the interviewer you find that he does look intimidating. You somehow fumble through the meeting. As you walk out of the room you know that you’ve blown it. And your friend says, ” You are a stupid oaf. You couldn’t even get the simplest of answers right. Even if you did get the job you would probably have screwed it up.” By now you are probably thinking that this is not a great friend to hang out. But would you be surprised if I told you that this friend……

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Procrastination is NOT about laziness

Last week I had to prepare for an important presentation. I was pitching for a deal, which, if it went through, would increase my top line by a possible 30%. The presentation was on Monday and until the Friday before that, I was nowhere near getting started on it. I had known about the meeting a good 10 days in advance. I was completely aware of what the presentation could do for my business. To be on the safe side, I had even kept my Friday relatively free to ensure that I would be able to give time to the presentation. But when Friday came I couldn’t seem to get round to it. There were the constant emails to check. My desk had to be organized. Then I had to check my Facebook and LinkedIn accounts to make sure I knew what was happening in the world. And then I got hungry and had to take a break. Then somebody sent me a funny video on WhatsApp that I had to watch. If any of this sounds familiar, these are the typical symptoms of most procrastinators There is an important task with a deadline. You know you need to spend……

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7 Leadership Lessons I learnt from Game of Thrones

  Game of Thrones is a hot favourite right now for all TV buffs. Many claim that its popularity is because of the high drama, violence and sex depicted in the series. The serial does indeed have a high dose of fantasy (with dragons, warlords and wights thrown in for good measure).  But I believe that the one big reason many of us are quite addicted to the show is because of the strong characters that most of us can identify with. There is the noble bastard, Jon Snow, who rises to a high position inspite of his background or the witty dwarf Tyrion Lannister who is one of the strongest characters in the show inspite of his looks or the lack of support of his family. Then there is Jamie the King Slayer, who shows two sides of his character, first by pushing an 8 year old child off a high tower and in another scene returns to rescue his friend Breine of Tarth. And then there is the strong Danarys Stromborm, Mother of dragons, who grew from a  timid girl to a queen on-screen, who rules savages and believes in non-violence. Perhaps we feel a strong connect with Game of Thrones because we see bits……

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If you are a manager – get good at sharing bad news

The dilemma of sharing bad news Leaders are often the messenger and sometimes the creator of bad news. While the saying goes “Don’t shoot the messenger” unfortunately that is exactly what some employees want to do when they hear bad news. Bad news can be of different proportions and impact. It could range from mass lay offs and salary cuts to asking someone to work over weekends or asking a low performer to leave. Often the manager may have taken the decision due to circumstances or business needs. At other times the decision may be taken by someone else and the manager is expected to deliver it to the team. At such times leaders often feel uncomfortable with doing the job because at a human level they may not want to impact another human being. Often managers anticipate a negative reaction from the team or are uncomfortable dealing with emotional outbursts. Some managers avoid sharing bad news or delegate it to someone else. Some try to mask it with jargon or logic. At the same time there are a few who handle it with finesse . Why is it important to get good at sharing bad news: As a manager it is part of your job and it will be……

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Is perfectionism your imperfection?

Perfectionism is not a quest for the best. It is a pursuit of the worst in ourselves, the part that tells us that nothing we do will ever be good enough – Julia Cameron Most of us have been brought up with the quote ” Practice makes perfect”. We believe that perfection is a virtue to aspire for. Perfection is very useful in making us want to do a good job and delivering outstanding results. However when perfectionism starts driving us rather than we driving for perfection it is time to take a closer look and understand if we are in trouble. Perfectionism often leads to the following problems: Limits thought, inclusivity and creativity: Perfectionists live with the idea that there is only one best way and that is the way they like it. As a result it limits respect for individuality and diversity when working with others. We have all worked with a boss or colleague who is never happy with the outcome. Working with such an individual besides being highly stressful is bound to limit creativity and thought as there is no place for deviations or opinions other than those believed in by the perfectionist. Science and research on the other hand……

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4 things to consider if you are unsure of a career move

 ” I’ve come to realise your career is all about the choices you make. Every single one matters.”  – Demi Lovato Manoeuvring your career through different roles and opportunities can sometimes be confusing. Often an opportunity arrives at your door and you feel unsure. On the surface it looks, feels and sounds just right. But something is holding you back. It could be a  personal circumstance or just a gut feeling but you are hesitant. Surprisingly, this could even happen with an opportunity that you have been waiting for years and thought you really wanted.     When making career decisions it is easy to

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Are you “playing to win” or “playing not to lose”?

chess kings

“ In order to succeed your desire for success need to be higher than you fear of failure” – Bill Cosby While we would all want to be always consistent in our performance unfortunately professional and personal effectiveness like life does not come in absolutes. As most business leaders grow in an organisation there are subtle changes that start happening in their personal mindsets.  

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